To say the last few weeks have been hard overshadows some of the truly shocking times in my life. They have been uncomfortable and difficult, knowing what I need to do, but feeling like I’m trapped in treacle, moving so slowly and purposelessly, achieving nothing.
Hoping for a payoff for what I have done, but still on the outside looking in. Sometimes it feels like I’m standing on the riverbank, watching the party boat go past. All lights and music and people having a good time, but I’m too far away to be part of it.
Change comes and I don’t cope, I want it, but it makes me uncomfortable and paranoid. I like piggy banks- I can invest in small change
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